Are you someone that has been through breakup after breakup, and you have added this person to your “do not contact” list? Even though you do this, getting over them can be harder than you imagined. You may even be to the point where you are trying to find advice online on how to get over your ex.

You can get rid of things that they gave you, delete their messages, burn their pictures, block them on social media and text but the hard part is getting them out of your mind.

Maybe you cannot figure out what went wrong, or you are thinking about the last time that they hold you. No matter what is on your mind, the hardest thing about breaking up with someone is to stop thinking about them all the time.

Even though there is no real answer to getting over deep feelings of love, you have to start working on doing this so that you can be happy and free.

Here are some things that experts and regular people have said can help you to get over your breakup and stop thinking about your ex:

Find Distractions

This is one thing that many people after a breakup try to do. Find things that you love to do and start concentrating on those things. You can even find something new.

A new thing or project can distract your mind and help you to find things that you love. You can get a new job, start a new hobby, or even start a business or write a book. Find something that you can do that you have a deep emotional connection with so that you can keep your mind focused on that.


You need to have boundaries in all of your relationships, but did you know that you need to have your own boundaries as well? To stop thinking of someone, you will need to set boundaries on what you are thinking of.

When you first breakup with someone, you need to realize that you don’t have to have your ex to move on in your life. Tell them that you don’t want them to call or text you no matter what.

You can also figure out how to tell people that you share mutual relationships with. If they do what they say, you will have time to heal and grow in your life.

Feel Your Feelings

When you get your heart broken you need to take time to really feel your feelings. You do not need to hide them or try to keep them in. When you breakup with someone you love, it can be hurtful, and you need to allow the hurt to come through so that you can face it.

Once you have felt all of your emotions, find a way to get them out of your mind.

Left Over Feelings

Even after you have felt all that you think you can feel, chances are that you will still have some feelings left for the person that you are broken up with. This is normal and that is part of people and their emotions. It is going to take time to stop loving your ex and if you still love them, that is okay.

Love is a great thing and when love comes to you, it is never a wrong thing. But sometimes love doesn’t make a relationship work and when it ends and you have to move on, you will still want what is best for your ex.

Maybe you will stop someday caring about them but if you don’t, that is okay as well.


You need to take time to worry about you. Take time to go to the spa or to get a massage. Take long baths so that you can get your energy back. Let go of the feelings that are leaving you tired as you practice your self-care routines.

Once you do this, you will not feel as trapped. You will feel like a new person and be ready to face the world head on.

Find Closure

It is important that after a breakup that you get closure that can bring you peace. Your ex might tell you things that will never make you feel better, but you need to have time to heal.

Sometimes you can’t stop thinking about someone because there is no closer there and you have to find the closure to move on.

Write yourself a letter about why you broke up with your ex. Do not send it just write it and then put it away. This can be things that you wanted to say to them that you never said. You can even go and talk to a therapist if you need to.

When you need to talk to your ex to have this closure, do it. Just be careful what you say and make sure that you are getting it all out so that you don’t have to keep repeating the same things over and over.

Know Yourself

Really take time to get to know who you are. You need to give yourself attention and find things to do to keep you busy.

Find people in your life that you haven’t spent much time with lately. Watch your favorite show, go to the movies, take a class, or whatever you want to do that makes you have fun in your life.

Journal It

Journaling can help you to get rid of thoughts that you have inside of you that you don’t want to share with others. Take time to journal your feelings and really get them out.

Put on some music and get out your journal and write down everything that you are feeling. Write down your thoughts and your feelings.

Getting over someone that you have had in your life for a long time can be hard but as you write things down and learn to focus more on yourself, you can heal. Stop focusing on them and thinking about them and focus on more important things.

Get Rid of Reminders

You need to take time to get rid of things in your home and in your car that remind you of your ex. Get rid of their pictures, get rid of things that they have given you or even other things that you are reminded everyday of them.

Remember that you even need to avoid the places that you and your ex used to frequent, at least for a while. Once you get healed and can move on, you can go back to those places but give yourself a break for a while.