It is a known fact that you can’t have a new relationship unless you fully discard the old one. Having lingering feelings about a past love will only hurt the new relationship. You have to completely let go of all attachments to exes before you can be emotionally available to a new partner.
For those who are wondering if their partner is truly over an ex-lover, there are seven sure ways to know.
When someone is over a relationship, there are no lingering feelings and they are even happy their ex is doing well if they are emotionally healthy themselves. Those who continue to chronicle how their ex added to their unhappiness isn’t really over it.
They Revisit Old Places With You
Your partner will take you to the same places they went to with their ex. This isn’t necessarily something they do consciously, but it demonstrates they are just looking for someone to fill the void in their old life rather than create new memories in their current life.
They Remain Friends With Their Ex
There is no reason for this with only a couple of exceptions. The two exceptions are if they have children with them or if they work with them. Otherwise, they each should move on and apart.
The Ex’s Possessions Remain in Their Home
This can mean only one of two things. Either they just can’t let go and are avoiding giving their ex’s possession back to them because they know it will be final at that point or they are secretly seeing them. It may be good to ask your new love why they won’t return the items to see which situation this falls into.
You Have No Emotional Connection
Sure, you may have tons of physical chemistry. You may hump like bunnies, but if there isn’t any emotional depth to your relationship it could be because they are reserving that portion of their heart for their ex.
They Keep Up With Their Ex on Social Media
One sure way to know if your partner hasn’t let go of their ex is whether they keep up with them on social media. Those who have let go unfriend and unfollow them. Those who are clinging want to know everything going on in their life and tend to get upset when they do.
They Compare You
Self analyzation is a part of the healing process after a breakup. However, those thoughts are best left in your head. If your partner compares you to their ex in any number of ways, it is a bad sign. That goes for even if they say you are better because it means they are still thinking about their ex. Be especially wary if they give you a negative comparison to their ex because that is disrespectful and shows that they aren’t over the past.
In the end, there is nothing you can do if your new love isn’t over their ex. If you aren’t already married, then it is time to move on to someone who can appreciate all you have to offer. If you are already married and notice they still have these lingering feelings, talk to them about it and urge them to seek counseling so your relationship will be better.