When you first start dating someone you will see that it is amazing. It might be everything you ever thought it would be and when you marry your partner, you will be so excited that they were the person that you have always dreamed of. No one ever thinks that when they marry their partner that they will marry someone that has narcissistic behaviors. This doesn’t mean that this doesn’t happen sometimes though and sometimes people that are narsisstic are often great manipulators.

As time goes on, being a narcissist can be more seen and this can happen as time goes on in the relationship and you get to know them more.

When you marry this person and you start having a life with this person, you will learn more things about them, and you will see their behaviors and habits. If your partner is a narcissist or has the personality of one, it can mean that you see someone completely different than they were at the beginning. This can add to the hardship of getting used to being married to someone. Since a narcissist has different kinds of behaviors, it can be hard to be in a relationship with them because they can cause you to have stress and to have bad mental health. Over 19.5 million people in the United States show signs of being narcissistic. If you feel that you are with someone with this kind of personality, you need to know the common marriage problems that you might likely face.

Narcissistic Personality

A person that is a narcissist is someone that cares about themselves, but the clinical definition of this disorder tells you that it is a personality disorder that is a mental health issue. The main thing about this disorder is that they find themselves to be above everyone else and that they don’t have compassion for others. They are people that have to have all of the attention.

Many people that have the narcissistic personality disorder will have many of the same personality traits. They will find themselves to be the most important of all people, they will feel that they need people to always make over them and love them and they are people that feel entitled to be able to do whatever they want.

These people will take their talents and will throw them in the face of those around them and they will believe that their strengths should give them the most power and the most success, even over other people. These people think that they are the only one that is worthy or praise and admiration. They will do whatever it takes to get whatever they want including putting people down, taking advantage of others and not having compassion in any way. They will never look at someone else’s feelings but will only care about their own.

Other traits that you might see with someone with this disorder is that they get mad easily and they feel that they should be treated a certain way. If you don’t do what they want, they will put you down and will do what they can to make themselves seem more important.

Problems

A person with this disorder will look at the relationship and will do what they can to make it hard. Even though they are not trying to make their relationship better, they will blame you for the things that go wrong. People with this disorder are great at getting people to trust them but they will manipulate them along the way. Some people marry these types of people and if you feel that you are with someone that is a narcissist, you need to make sure that you find a way to manage your marriage and the problems that can come along. Here are some of the marriage problems that you can have with this kind of person in your life.

Control

A narcissist wants to always be in control, and they feel powerful when they can control everything in their life and the life of their partner. This can cause them to manipulate you in everything you do and to try to control you. They will do things such as gaslight you or put you down or blame you when you argue to make you feel bad. They will say sweet things to you so that you will feel guilty, and this is a way that they control you. This can be bad for your mental health, but it will make the narcissist happy that they are powerful over you.

Children and Competition

Someone with this personality disorder will do what they can to make the children dislike you. They will do what they can to have the children turn against you. The narcissist even wants to have more attention than the children and they will compete with them to get the attention from you over the children.  They might even try to control the children to think like they do, and this will cause so many problems with them and the children. It will feel like you are always competing with them.

One-Sided Thinking

A narcissist will do whatever they can to make you feel that they are better than you. When you do something good, they will say that they helped you to do it or that it was because of them that you were successful. They will also try to take credit if you do something great or even if your kids do something great. They will debate you or get angry if you tell them, they are wrong and they will think that you are competing with them to be better than they are.

Jealousy

Many narcissist show jealous tendencies. They will think that you are having affairs if someone talks to you. If they feel that you are giving attention to someone else, they will become very jealous. They will also feel very jealous if they think that someone around them is smarter than they are. When this person gets jealous, they argue, and they get very angry. If they feel that someone is getting your love instead of them, they will do things to you for revenge such as be unfaithful or flirty with other people. They will do whatever they can to make sure that they are not competing with someone for your attention.

Abuse

Sometimes narcissist will be abusive. This can happen in verbal abuse but can come in the form of other kinds of abuse as well. Many narcissists will abuse their partner to control them and to be in charge. Some will use verbal abuse to make their partner feel stupid or to blame them or belittle them for things that they have not even done. When the blaming is out of control the narcissist will blame you. They will make sure to be a totally different person in front of your family or your friends and they will make sure to be kind and loving until that person is out of their sight and it is just you as well. This will cause others to believe that you are the one with the problem.

People that have narcissist personality disorders will do whatever they can to be in control. They will take control of how much money you get, what you spend it on, what kind of foods that you eat and how much time you spend with family and friends. They will do whatever they can to keep you in control even blackmailing you with their emotions. They will do things such as emotionally abuse you so that they can control you and sometimes they will even hit or kick you.

Moving Away from This Situation

Sometimes you can get help to deal with a narcissistic partner through counseling or therapy but sometimes this will not help. You can try counseling as long as your partner agrees, and they often will because they think that you are the one with the problem and not them. They might get angry if you say that something is wrong with them. If you get them to agree to go to therapy though, chances are that you might need your own counseling to deal with this person in your life.

There are different kinds of counseling that you can get such as going into the office or even doing online counseling. You can use therapy to help you to deal with the mental health issues that a narcissist partner has. There are different kinds of therapy that your counselor might use in order to help you to improve your relationship. There are also traditional and non-traditional ways to treat a person with narcissistic personality disorders.

Therapy can help you to look at the problems that you have in your marriage and to figure out how to solve them and get the help that you need.